How to Light Up a Room (Even on a Meh Day)

Today has not been my favorite. I’m menstruating, I’m running on what feels like a 147-hour sleep deficit that I may or may not catch up on in the next two decades, and I’m still recovering from a weekend packed with Easter festivities and birthday magic for my newly minted five-year-old.

But even in the middle of that fog, I made a decision: I want to be the kind of person who lights up a room.

On my drive home after dropping my one-year-old at daycare, I popped in a 17-minute podcast about just that—how to light up a room. I took mental notes between red lights, and a few gems stood out:

• Smile—it lifts you and the people around you.

• Make eye contact and use open, positive body language.

• Listen actively and attentively.

• Show real curiosity about others.

• Celebrate what people are excited about—validate, encourage, and reflect that enthusiasm back.

(There were probably more, but again, I was driving, so we’re working with the highlights here.)

You know how some obituaries say, “She lit up every room she walked into”? I've always admired that. I’ve been more often described as “you can hear her coming a mile away—and long after she’s left.” I’m a loud lady and I love loudly. And sometimes that means I show it in full volume.

But today I wasn’t aiming to fill a room with sound—I wanted to illuminate it with energy, presence, and warmth.

Small wrinkle: I work remotely. So the “rooms” I’m lighting up are mostly just my home office and the occasional Zoom grid.

Still, I wanted to give it a shot.

After five hours of meetings, I didn’t exactly feel like a glowing beacon of light. More like a tired, flickering candle. But one of those calls stood out—it was an intro chat with a fractional creative director I met through my former community in Virginia. We ran over our time talking about agency life, team management, client challenges, marketing and it was positive, energizing and even fun!

I followed up with my usual thank-you email, and got this in response:

“It was great talking with you too. I love your excitement to help solve problems.”

That one line made my whole day.

Maybe my obituary won’t say I lit up every room. But I’d be thrilled if it read:
“She lit up Zoom rooms and passionately solved problems.”

That feels just right.

Now, I’m off to pick up my kids and see if I can light up their little worlds—because at the end of the day, isn’t that what really matters?